Tuesday, May 5, 2009

This about sums it up

Today's post is prompted by

Heads Or Tails

Today is EDGE: Any Past Theme ... and oddly (again) how timely. I missed the "Down on the Farm" week, which was to be about anything on a farm. Oh do I have a good one. Let me direct your attention to a past post (coincidentally another Heads or Tails theme about "points"). Here's the followup picture ...

The driveway (yes, it really is that steep) is now complete (has been for about 5 weeks) and to bless the driveway ... you guessed it ... yep, that's what it is ... something found on a farm, called manure in polite company. I don't know the owner - no doubt a neighborhood dog ... and there is a newspaper lying next to it, which is suspicious (dogs also being known to be drawn to newspaper - you know, fetching and the like) ... so there you go.

So why do I say this about sums it up? Well, it's the perfect compliment to the whole "poopy" (G-rated blog) story about me having to explain "DRIVEWAY" to the CSR from a third world country and, as an extra bonus ... happens to describe my day today.

We had a party on Saturday (to celebrate the 135th running of the Kentucky Derby). Fifty-seven (57) delightful people in my home ... along with 30 lovely children ... and it rained ... and the toilet clogged ... and we ran out of food ... but thankfully there was still alcohol and no horses were harmed in this year's event ... so overall it was a good day.

However, today, as I was doing laundry, the toilet overflowed - bubbled like a fountain of, um "poopy" water - spewing forth onto my hardwood floors and into the closet (which is located next to the toilet). Please understand, I wasn't doing the laundry in the toilet ... I did use a washing machine ... which is located on the other side of the downstairs bathroom - in a room designated specifically for washing (and drying) clothes.

I didn't know whether to take a video or picture ... so I grabbed a mop - not my more brilliant move, I should have grabbed the camera and called someone. Well - after I cleaned up a bit of the mess, I didn't want to wring the mop - you know ... er - "out" ... because I didn't want to touch it.

But I got over that mainly because it wasn't cleaning up itself - and I put on latex gloves - cleaned everything up, poured drain cleaner in the laundry room sink and went upstairs to take a shower.

About halfway through the detox - I thought to myself ... "huh - I wonder how many gallons of water I'm flushing through the clogged main line?" Brilliant.

(You see, I came to the mainline conclusion about a month before the party, because the toilet overflowed right after my gallbladder surgery, while I was doing laundry ... not using the bathroom). So we used mainline drain cleaner and all seemed to be well.

We were mistaken.

So after my shower, I peeked into the downstairs bathroom, and sure enough ... poop all over the floor again. This time, it appeared that it came from the literal bowels of the drain ... I'm talking brown/green thick slime ... and corn - which I don't remember serving ... ew.

I'm calling the plumber this afternoon. I discussed it briefly with my husband - who wondered why I hadn't called him today. I said, "I'm going to call the plumber this afternoon." End of discussion.

Seriously though, we'd try the Kruegerator on it, but the way the pipes are configured, we can't isolate the clogged area ... so alas, the Kruegerator won't work. It saddens me to have to call a professional.

So now I have a much better idea of what happens when "poop" hits the fan ...

Rate this at Humor Blogs


Barb said...

I can laugh right? I sure hope so because I am!

Maybe it wasn't a dog in the driveway. Maybe it was a drunken guest? Nah.. probably not.

I love when you play HoT, by the way. :)

Tumblewords: said...

Oh, no! I don't EVEN wanna laugh. Althugh your writing is humorous - the event is so stinky.

peppylady (Dora) said...

I also did mine as a continue of down on the farm.
I missed the running of the roses.

Coffee is on.